10

No that is not a perfect 10, thats the size of my biggest follicle. I am beyond disappointed in the way the stims are going or rather not going. I have the 10 and a lot of 9s and 8s. There wasnt much change from sat to today which sucks. I think the 10 was an 8 on sat which means its not even growing a mm a day. blah!

So 3 more days of meno.pur and another ultrasound on friday. I went ahead and ordered 5 days of meno because I am sure I will need it.

Pumpkin

We decided to carve a pumkin today. This was our first pumpkin carving event and I must say it was cool. Here's a before picture of our pumpkin:

This is the kind of concentration you need when carving pumpkins lol:
Tada!!! This is our finished product:


Since I am a fre.ak about burning down the house, I have to go buy batteries for the light that goes inside of it.

Zero, Nada, Zilch

Thats how many good follicles I have. I had my ultrasound today and had a bunch of immature little f&8#$#s. I think the biggest one was around 8mm which is really nothing. I was/am extremely dissapointment. I feel like we are moving backwards instead of forward. I now will take 1.5 meno.pur. for 3 days and go for another ultrasound on tues. I hope by then I have something worthy.

So now I am at home and hiding from the world, I am unsure when I will come out of hiding.

Popp.in the che.r.ry.

I popped my injetable che.rry today. I must say that I did freak out a little bit. We had a little problem with the set up and then all the prepping was done for the actual show. I kinda panicked a little. I was scared because I dint know how much pressure to use. So heres a picture of the actual moment.
L was my cheerleader and according to him, at first I froze and then I almost hyperventilated. So he starts bribing me lol First he offered me ice cream. Then he said books. Because I was a big girl and was able to give myself the injection, I got these two.
I think tomorrow will go smoothly.

A New Step

I finished the clomid today and will start meno.pur tomorrow. To say that I am scared is an understatement. Besides the physical part of giving the shot, I am scared of what this means. To me this is so much more than just taking the clomid. This means that I really am infertile and need help.

I am also scared of the hope that this cycle brings. Although I have tried hard and keep trying to tell myself that this might not work. My heart is filled with hope that this will be our "cure".

And We're Off!

Okay this time we really are off and running. I had my ultra sound today and passed. No cysts! I am starting clomid today for 5 days then men.opur, for 3 days and an ultra sound next sat am. So I am hoping! Hoping that this is a step in the right direction for us

I will try to give myself the shots and hopefully I dont chicken out. Haha

Ready, Set, Go?

So AF showed today and I have an US. scheduled for tomorrow. I am thinking that the cyst is still there because I am feeling pain on my right side which is the same as last month.

Today I have a headache, cramps, my period, and I am just exhausted so I am going to get my heating pad and my pjs and go night night.

Come Out...

Come out come out wherever you are. I am on the white pills of my bcp pack and ready for AF to get here. I am ready to start although I think I will still have that cyst in there. I really hope not because I am going insane standing in the sidelines.

Its funny that I keep checking the tp for any little sign on redness to signal her arrival.

Come out Come out

Come out where ever you are. Is anybody out there?

Kick Me?

I currently have a job in the early childhood education industry, in the management side. I love my job and it doesn't really affect me to be around all the kids. I like it. The one thing missing is that I don't have an early childhood background. I am actually a business major and all my experience is in that area.

So I am taking some courses through the local technical college. This semester I am taking one class. Today the teacher looks around the room and says "So everyone here has or has had children, as in children of your own, except for..." this is when she looks directly at me and say "...you, right?"

Do I have a sign on my forehead that says "childless person over here" right next to the one that says "punch me in the gut"? Do I not look like mother material? Needless to say I didn't say much the rest of the class. I felt like the outsider that I am. No I don't have children, No I cant tell you much about raising children. And that hurts. That hurts a lot because I so want to experience that.

I am not liking being on the sideline this month. I want to join the game!!!